Swept From the Sea - * * 1/2*

Swept From the Sea

* * 1/2*


Beeban Kidron directs this romantic epic based on Joseph Conrad’s short story, Amy Foster. But while the film captures the scenery and scope necessary for an epic romance, it falls short with a stale plot and a flat romance.

Vincent Perez stars as Yanko, a Ukranian on an emigrant ship to America. He is washed overboard during a severe storm, and washes ashore on the English countryside. With his ragged appearance and unknown tongue, the locals take him for a madman. He soon finds himself working for a local property owner, Mr. Swaffer (Joss Ackland), who treats him little better than a slave.

Only two people sense the humanity inside Yanko. The first is Amy Foster (Rachel Weisz), a quiet woman, born to a scandalous marriage, who is as much of an outcast in the community as Yanko. Amy is unafraid of the “mad” stranger, and treats him with kindness and love. The second is James Kennedy (Ian McKellen), the town’s doctor, who is as attracted to the man as Amy, and sets out to teach the stranger English.

The tale is told in flashback by Kennedy to Swaffer’s daughter (Kathy Bates). However, both of them play integral parts in the tale. It seems odd that Miss Swaffer pretends as if she doesn’t know the details and that Kennedy would have to explain so much to her.

With its broad themes of ostracism and acceptance, Swept From the Sea paints the world in black and white. The film is at its best in its earliest scenes, such as Yanko’s departure for America, or the English town’s handling of a tragedy. At these times, there are hints of shading…we don’t quite know where the film will take us, but we’re looking forward to the ride. Then, once all its characters are in place, the film settles down into a rut, with no surprises and no excitement.

In another key problem with the film, the lovers, Amy and Yanko, lack definition. A quiet woman, Amy says very little, and does little more. Rachel Weisz never manages to convey any sense of Amy’s inner life, and she remains dead to us and the world. Yanko fares a little better. At least Vincent Perez gives him a spark of passion. However, when the two are together, that spark does not ignite.

Luckily, there’s a very strong supporting cast. Ackland, McKellen and Bates may be playing nearly featureless characters, but they utilize their crafts to enliven the hollow shells and give them humanity. Ian McKellen in particular has a difficult job. The film hits you over the head with his character’s subtle leanings, but McKellen manages to give Dr. Kennedy an air of dignity underneath it all.

When the supporting cast isn’t onscreen, at least there are some beautiful vistas of the English countryside to occupy your attention, so you’re never quite bored. Yet, when going to see an epic romance, you usually expect a little more romance than what is delivered.

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The Gingerbread Man - * * *

The Gingerbread Man

Doing a John Grisham film seems to be the trendy way these days for an artistic director to make a commercial film. First Francis Ford Coppola tackled The Rainmaker, which is still the finest adaptation of any of Grisham’s works. Now Robert Altman gives his own unique stamp to Grisham’s first story written exclusively for the screen, The Gingerbread Man.

All Grisham films have to have a lawyer, and The Gingerbread Man is no exception. This time around, the lawyer is Rick Magruder (Kenneth Branagh), a somewhat unscrupulous criminal attorney in Savannah. His career is skyrocketing, but his life has fallen apart. He has divorced from his wife, Leeanne (Famke Janssen), and has a hard time keeping track of his children when they’re in his custody.

Trouble comes Rick’s way when he meets Mallory Doss (Embeth Davidtz), a waitress who is being stalked by a man she believes to be her crazy father (Robert Duvall). The old man drove a wedge between her and her ex-husband (Tom Berenger), and now it seems he may be out to kill her. Rick sets out to help her, but slowly gets drawn into the deadly game himself.

Meanwhile as a tempest is brewing in Rick’s life, a real storm is brewing outside. Hurricane Geraldo is building force and heading straight toward the Savannah coast. Hmmm…I wonder when it will hit?

The Gingerbread Man starts well, with a nearly trademark Altman party scene that informs us this won’t be the typical Grisham adaptation. The overlapping dialogue weaves a rich texture of Savannah life, and is an excellent backdrop for the film. Unfortunately, as the storm brews outside, chunks of the movie get torn away like debris in gale-force winds. While the film is thrilling over two-thirds of the way through, the film’s finale is a whimper of incredulity.

The cast is top notch, involving us even though the characters are never quite endearing. Shining out among the talented cast are Duvall, who gives the eerie coot a note of authenticity, Robert Downey Jr as a booze-ridden private eye, and Daryl Hannah as Rick’s legal assistant.

The film is neither the typical John Grisham tale, nor the typical Robert Altman film. Although involving a lawyer, the film is more personal and compelling than most of Grisham’s work. It’s good to see the protagonist as something either than a fresh idealist just out of law school. The film is much more linear than most of Altman’s work. While the opening carries his distinctive touch, as the film progresses it gains a greater sense of anonymity.

Still, even with its flawed ending, The Gingerbread Man is an enjoyable tale to watch. Solid directing and an excellent cast make for a thrilling initial 90 minutes, and even when the good actors start doing stupid things, at least you can enjoy the good acting.

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Spice World - 1/2*

Spice World

Talk about a movie that seemed dated before it even hit the theaters! Spiceworld is the feature film debut of the pre-fabricated pop band, The Spice Girls. It’s intended as a sort of Hard Day’s Night, but ends up simply hard to watch.

When watching the Spice Girls, I’m reminded of an old Saturday Morning Cartoon trick (such as from The Smurfs, The Snorks, or Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) in which identically animated creatures are differentiated into characters merely by one personality quirk and a different name. The Spice Girls are themselves as interchangable as Pringles, and about as talented.

There’s Ginger (Geri Halliwell), the brainy one, Sporty (Melanie Chisholm), the athletic one, Baby (Emma Bunton), the childish one, Posh (Victoria Adams), the fashion-conscious one, and Scary (Melanie Brown), the one with a tongue pierced back so far you’re almost certain the post sticks out her throat.

The film itself doesn’t really have a plot. It follows the girls as they travel here and there, culminating at their “first live performance” at Albert Hall. The action, however, seems more like a hodgepodge of mismatched ideas.

The various misfires include: an alien encounter, a fiendish tabloid editor scheming to wreck The Spice Girls, the shooting of a Spice Girls documentary, a movie producer (George Wendt) trying to pitch various ideas for a Spice Girls movie (nearly all of which, though incredibly far fetched, seem more plausible than the mess with which they ended up), a meeting with a pregnant friend (whose sole purpose seems to be to maintain the film maxim that all pregnant characters must give birth before the movie ends), a boating adventure, a bus race, club-hopping (wherein apparently no one notices the famous Spice Girls among the crowd…even when they start to sing), and an assorted number of musical performances, press conferences, and general all-around celebrity stuff. Whew.

For some reason, the film is littered with star cameos. From Elton John to Elvis Costello, from Bob Hoskins to Meat Loaf. Heck, even Roger Moore shows up, though he can’t decide if he’s parodying himself as James Bond, or if he’s lobbying to be the reincarnation of Ernst Stavro Blofeld. Richard E. Grant has the largest secondary part, a thankless role of the band’s manager, Clifford.

The celebrity spotting is partially amusing, and a decent way to pass the time when confronted with the rest of the film. Neither amusing or spontaneous, when the Spice Girls are between songs they are deadly boring. Their songs are alright, but they play like lifeless adaptations of the music videos.

My advice to fans is: stay home and watch that video collection, or at least spin that cd a couple of more times…either option will be more enjoyable than the film. Non-fans should know to stay well away from this one.

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Phantoms - * *

Why is it that Hollywood has such a hard time adapting the works of best-selling horror authors to the screen? Witness the countless failed atempts at adapting Stephen King’s horror novels. Not a one (excepting maybe Misery and The Shining) has been worth a dime. Enter the works of Dean Koontz. Hollywood already made a botch of his novel Hideaway. Now, the curse strikes again with Phantoms.

Dr. Jenny Pailey (Joanna Going) is returning to her small hometown of Snowfield, Colorado, bringing her sister Lisa (Rose McGowan) back from L.A. But when the two sisters arrive, they find the small town completely deserted…almost. They begin to discover bodies, but are clueless as to what might have caused such widespread fatality. Could it be disease? A chemical agent? Radiation? An amazingly efficient lunatic? Or something else . . .

The girls are not alone long. Soon, they are joined by the county sheriff, Bryce Hammond (Ben Affleck), and a couple of his deputies (including Liev Schreiber), and later by some anti-terrorism experts, and, of all things, a tabloid writer (Peter O’Toole), who may truly have an idea of what’s going on. The purpose of all these newcomers seems purely to provide the movie with more bodies to kill without having to eviscerate its leads.

The title of the film is never explicitly explained, yet there are several options to pick from: the phantoms could be of the dead inhabitants of the town (who have a mysterious knack of haunting the living), or perhaps it could apply to the ultimate source of all the death. But, luckily, the ludicrous (and grammatically incorrect) line used so prominently in the advertising campaign (“Throughout history there have been unexplained mass disappearances…scientists call this phenomenon ‘phantoms’.”) is nowhere to be found in the movie.

Of the actors that actually have a character to play, most of them do a good job. Affleck and Going are appealing, but O’Toole seems to be slumming it up a bit here. Of the recognizable characters, only Liev Schreiber hits the wrong note, aiming his performance way over the top in a role that could have been much subtler.

There are some rather effective moments in the film. The opening scenes, when the girls begin to explore the apparently deserted town, unsure of what is going on. Unfortunately the mystery is dispelled all too quickly, and we’re left with only one unknown for the film to solve: who will die before the end credits roll. However, with the constant influx of new generic characters, rest assured that it will be no one worth caring for. Some cleverer writing could have cured this problem, enhancing both the mystery and the overall film.

Another noteworthy sequence involves Affleck and a dog that may or may not be what it seems. By this point, the movie has lost most of its plausiblity, but it goes to show that a good setup and proper pacing can create suspense out of thin air.

However, ultimately the movie fails. The majority of its action seems to be of the “generic character does something stupid and dies” variety. The ultimate source of the mystery in the film, when it finally is revealed, is disappointing…as is the unneccessary hook for a sequel.

There was a spark of an idea in Phantoms, but that spark fizzles early, leaving a movie as vacant and abandoned as the town of Snowfield, Colorado.

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Preview of 1998

What to Look Forward to in 1998

The following is a list of the top thirty movies that I am looking forward to the most in 1998. That doesn’t mean that they will all necessarily be good, or (in some cases) that they will even make a 1998 release date. It simply means that these films have caught my attention in one way or another, and here’s why:

30. Ed TV
Ron Howard returns to directing comedy, the genre that made him famous (with Night Shift, Splash and Parenthood). He’s also has a good cast lined up…but will there be comparisons to The Truman Show?
29. Small Soldiers
This one almost sounds like a cross between Toy Story and Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Knowing how most crosses go, it probably won’t be as good as either, but it sounds intriguing.
28. The Mask of Zorro
Long in post-production, the mere fact that Anthony Hopkins will be portraying the elder Zorro is enough to pique my interest.
27. The Big Lebowski
And the Coen Brothers finally debut their followup to Fargo, which will undoubtedly suffer a backlash, warranted or no. (See how the hillarious Hudsucker Proxy was overshadowed by the brilliant Barton Fink). Still, they’re the Coens, and that fact alone makes this one worth looking forward to.
26. Dark City
The fact that New Line doesn’t have enough confidence in this one to solidify a release date doesn’t bode well. But, the eerily effective trailers and a good cast may signal redemption.
25. Godzilla
It’s not gonna be a deep movie, and it looks like it’ll be a bit too humorous for some, but it should at least have some great FX.
24. The Crowded Room
Another film that’s been a long time coming. I first heard of this one back in the early 90s when James Cameron was contemplating his first drama. Now Danny DeVito is on helm, and Leonardo DiCaprio is set to star. Now let’s see if they can actually get this one on film…
23. Lethal Weapon 4
The biggest problem Lethal Weapon 4 faces, despite its extremely short development cycle, is the sheer amount of characters that are carried over from the earlier films. This is a film with five major characters, not even counting the villain. But so far, the series hasn’t been a let down…
22. Lost in Space
The inital trailer, released last year, sparked some hope. Perhaps this one won’t be the disaster a “Lost in Space” movie is bound to be. However, the recent (and more revealing) trailer isn’t as impressive. Still, the film promises some good FX…
21. Star Trek 9
Pro: It’s a Star Trek movie. Con: It’s an odd-numbered Star Trek movie.
20. The X-Files Movie
This one’s got a built-in audience. The series cliffhanger leads directly into the movie. But will the tv audience revolt, and if they don’t will there be any more secrets left in the show?
19. U.S. Marshalls
Hmmmm…a sequel to The Fugitive without The Fugitive. Well, Tommy Lee Jones is good…but can Wesley Snipes fill the shoes of Harrison Ford?
18. Eaters of the Dead
A Viking saga probably won’t do terribly well in the marketplace, but this is based off a Crichton novel. Will it be Jurassic Park…or Congo?
17. Sphere
The other Crichton movie this year, but this one’s got the cast: Hoffman, Stone and Jackson. It can’t miss? Can it?
16. You Have Mail
Nora Ephron directs Tom Hanks Meg Ryan in a romantic comedy remake. Will lightning strike twice? The supporting cast of Greg Kinnear, Steve Zahn and Parker Posey will help.
15. Deep Impact
And now to the falling rock films. Deep Impact actually has the more interesting plot, but just look at the cast: Elijah Wood and Tea Leoni. OK, OK, it also has Morgan Freeman, Robert Duvall, Maximilian Schell and Vanessa Redgrave. But which camp will win?
14. Armageddon
Although lighter in the head, this one’s got the muscle: Willis, Buscemi, Affleck, Thornton, Stormare, and Patton. But what’s Liv Tyler doing here?
13. Breakfast of Champions
Hmmm…Bruce Willis doing Vonnegut? This one’ll be….interesting…
12. A Perfect Murder
Dial M For Murder was one of Hitchcock’s greatest films. Why mess with a classic? But since they are…Michael Douglas and Gwyneth Paltrow seem like a perfect cast to do it with.
11. What Dreams May Come
Cuba Gooding Jr. leads Robin Williams on a trip through the afterlife. Whichever Robin Williams shows up for this one, it sounds like a surrealistic hoot.
10. The Astronaut’s Wife
Something about this Outer Limits-ish film has piqued my curiosity. Will Charlize Theron and Johnny Depp be able to pull it off?
9. The Avengers
This one’s either heading to be one of the worst or the best films of the year. I didn’t care too much about this one until seeing the bizaare trailer. Ralph Fiennes and Uma Thurman are always ones to watch. And Sean Connery as the bad guy? Count me in.
8. City of Angels
Wings of Desire was a hit-and-miss film, mostly triumphing because of its style. Nicolas Cage and Meg Ryan can be counted on, but can Brad Silberling deliver the same hypnotic vision?
7. Arlington Road
Jeff Bridges, Tim Robbins and Joan Cusack….but is this a thriller or a comedy?
6. Saving Private Ryan
Steven Spielberg delivers the year’s first WWII film, with a cast including Tom Hanks and Matt Damon. What more do you want?
5. Prince of Egypt
The grand unveiling of DreamWorks’ animation division. It looks as if it will be powerful and epic in scope. And just take a look at that list of voice talent.
4. Eyes Wide Shut
Kubrick returns. He sure took a long time. Now, is the film any good?
3. The Truman Show
Jim Carrey tries another take at breaking out of his comedic mold. With Peter Weir at the helm, he may have a shot.
2. A Bug’s Life
How do you follow up a breakthrough film like Toy Story? With even better animation. The teaser was simply breathtaking.
1. The Thin Red Line
Just take a look at the cast associated with this one. Combine that with one of the most powerful novels about WWII, and the return of director Terrence Malick, and you’ve got a hard film to beat.
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The Best of 1997

Ahhh…it’s the end of another year, and time for reflection on what has gone by. Well, let’s cut to the chase. Here are my picks for the best of 1997:

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Runner Up – Al Pacino, Donnie Brasco
Winner – Robin Williams, Good Will Hunting
Both of these actors provided their best work in years. Pacino has been on a hot streak lately, but Williams has been in a rut. It was a close call, but the honor finally goes to Robin, whose performance in Good Will Hunting might be the best work he has ever done.

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Runner Up – Debbi Morgan, Eve’s Bayou
Winner – Irma P. Hall, Soul Food, Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, Nothing to Lose
Irma P. Who? That’s Irma P. Hall. You might very well recognize her if you saw her onscreen. She’s provided one excellent character turn after another, and anyone who could liven up something like Nothing to Lose deserves credit. Debbi Morgan is a close second as the cursed psychic aunt in Eve’s Bayou.

BEST ACTOR
Runner Up – Aaron Eckhart, In the Company of Men
Winner – Jack Nicholson, As Good As It Gets
Aaron Eckhart was quite simply the year’s best movie villain in the little seen date movie In the Company of Men. But he pales next to the force of Nicholson at his peak. Melvin Udall will go down as one of Jack’s best characters, and that’s some good company to be in.

BEST ACTRESS
Runner Up – Jodie Foster, Contact
Winner – Judi Dench, Mrs. Brown
In a field as sparse as this year’s best actresses, it would be a crime to overlook Jodie Foster. It was a summer sci-fi film, but just take another look at her congressional testimony scenes, and you’ll agree that she belongs here. However, Judi Dench emerges as the clear winner, breathing exuberant life into a dusty historical figure.

TOP TEN FILMS (in reverse order)

10. Wag the Dog
Quite simply, the best political comedy in a long, long time. This was the film that had the year’s single funniest scene: when Stanley Moss’ eternal optimism nearly runs out when he witnesses the actions of Ol’ Shoe. What’s better than a returning war hero?…
9. The Sweet Hereafter
Perhaps the most lyrical film on the list. Atom Egoyan’s study of grief and a small town takes a while to build it’s impact, but it’s a lasting one.
8. Chasing Amy
Kevin Smith redeems himself for Mallrats, and shows he still has some decent writing talents left (despite that hideous Superman script). This isn’t a film for all tastes, and Kevin’s directoral style needs a bit of polish, but what a script!
7. Donnie Brasco
First the Godfather reinvented the gangster film…then Goodfellas did it all over again. Just when you thought the well had finally run dry… along comes Donnie Brasco. While not in the same league as the former two gangster sagas, this gripping tale showed what a little creativity and a killer story can do for a dying genre. And to top it off, one of Pacino’s best performances in years (and that’s no easy feat).
6. Eve’s Bayou
An entrancingly powerful debut by writer-director Kasi Lemmons. A hauntingly beautiful setting, wonderfully crafted story, realistic characters and a superb ensemble cast all make this one stand out.
5. As Good As It Gets
The year’s best comedy. Wag the Dog may have the strongest laugh, but this one has the most. That combined with a superior performance by Nicholson makes this the hands down winner.
4. Good Will Hunting
Matt Damon and Ben Affleck deserve a round of applause. Not only is their acting first rate in this film, but they banded together and created the year’s best screenplay, and nearly the year’s best film. It was a close call, but it’s overreliance on pop psychology was the only thing that kept this one from topping the list. As it is, it’s still a wonderful film.
3. L.A. Confidential
A delightfully tangled, twisted web of film noir. Smart characters, smart dialogue and a smart plot all rolled up into one. Wow.
2. Contact
The year’s most overlooked film. Released as a summer blockbuster, and thereby discounted by many. However, not only does the film have spectacular effects (most of which are wonderfully subtle), a great cast, and an exciting story…but there’s actually meaning behind the film. It may have been a summer blockbuster, but it was a smart summer blockbuster. If not for the unfortunate final James Woods-Angela Bassett conversation (which dilutes some of movie’s impact), this one would have been #1. Instead the honor goes to…
1. Titanic
What more can you say about this one. Upon hearing of this project, even before learning of the budget, I was all prepared for a disaster (of the film, not the ship). Cameron’s lucky streak has to end some day, and this period romance seemed like the film to do it. Boy, was I wrong. He has resurrected the combination of spectacle and romance that used to be a Hollywood staple. Now we’re left to wonder: how will he top this?
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Star Kid - * *

Star Kid

Star Kid is a low budget children’s sci-fi superhero action film, and it’s not nearly as bad as that sounds.

Spencer Griffith (Joseph Mazzello) is your typical wimpish seventh grader: picked upon his mean older sister (Ashlee Levich) and schoolyard bully Turbo (Joey Simmrin), and without the guts to speak with the girl who has captured his heart (Lauren Eckstrom).

His life is changed when he discovers a spaceship which has landed in the local auto dump. It’s passenger: a robotic armored suit (the Cyborsuit, aka Cy) (voiced by Arthur Burghardt, and moved about by Alex Daniels). It was launched into space by the friendly and resourceful Trelkans to avoid its capture by the evil Brood Warriors. Soon, Spencer climbs inside and becomes a superhero!

At first, he uses the suit to wreak revenge upon those who tormented him when he was a weakling (particularly Turbo, the bully). However, soon a Brood Warrior comes to Earth to claim the cyborsuit, and Spencer must battle him to save his life and all mankind.

Mazzello is appealling as the title character, but most of his work is simply reaction shots and voice-overs once he’s inside the suit.

Star Kid is a mixed bag of design ideas. On the plus side, the Brood Warrior has an interesting little habit of pulling off various symbiotic parts of itself to use as tools or weapons. Also, there’s a lot of background information going on whenever we’re treated to a view through the Cyborsuit’s display. The clever little subroutines are similar to a junior version of the Terminator’s POV.

However, there are many flaws to Star Kid’s designs as well. The Trelkans, with their small stature and big (acne-ridden?) heads, don’t make for very inspiring good guys. And the Cyborsuit seems to be a bit too human-ish (how would the big-headed Trelkans ever fit inside???)

One of the things which works against the movie is its cheapness. For example, the metallic cyborsuit looks positively rubbery. And the Brood Warrior looks your generic Power Rangers foe. It’s hard to believe that any kid who has been exposed to modern movie-making magic will be awed by the FX here.

Still for that kid who can suspend enough disbelief, the film does have its charms. Adults might be more concerned about the sheer amount of household damage Spencer does in his Cyborsuit and in battle. Strangely, the adults in the film seem to be stunned, but laugh off what seems to amount to damage in the tens of thousands of dollars…

And considering that this movie could have been as bad as a random Power Ranger clone, it doesn’t actually turn out that bad.

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Hard Rain - * * 1/2*

Hard Rain

After stalling for nearly a year, Hard Rain finally makes it to the box office. Previously titled The Flood, the filmmakers quickly renamed it after the deluge of disaster pics, so as not to have it drown in the public’s eye. In a way, it’s fitting, since the disaster portion of the film is merely a backdrop, not the main focus. The heart of the film is a heist picture, albeit one with an ever present supply of water to provide additional difficulties. But all in all, the film is not a disaster in itself.

The small town of Huntingburg is being flooded. The sheriff (Randy Quaid) is evacuating the citizenry, even though he lost the recent election. He and his deputies, however, will be staying to protect the town from looters, as the sheriff feels doing his job well is the best revenge.

Also anticipating looters are the local banks. An armored car, guarded by Tom (Christian Slater) and Charlie (Ed Asner), is emptying the vaults of banks up and down the river.

That truck is the target of a group of thieves (led by Morgan Freeman), who are using the torrential rains to their unexpected advantage. However, the heist doesn’t go exactly as planned: Tom escapes and manages to hide the money.

Soon, the band of theives is after Tom to find the hidden money, and the police don’t know whether to trust Tom or lock him away as a potential looter.

There is a good setup in Hard Rain, with the three sides (the thieves, the cops, and the hero), each having its own idiosyncracies. The ragtag group of robbers is the most interesting, containing not only Freeman but an ex-science teacher (Dan Florek), a trigger-happy bible-quoting thug, and a nervous neophyte.

However, after this setup, the characterization goes nowhere. Morgan Freeman simply plays the part of “Morgan Freeman as a kindly but desperate thief”, and we’re never given any hows or whys for his character. The same goes for all the other characters as well, who offer no real surprises (especially if you’ve seen the spoiler-filled trailer). Christian Slater and fellow flood victim Minnie Driver are paired off, but there’s no more depth to their relationship than to their characters.

While we’re on the subject of screenwriting, the dialogue isn’t particularly deep, either. There are times that it’s servicable for fueling the bare minimums of an action picture, but others (particularly the comic relief) are purely atrocious. One entire subplot, involving an elderly civilian couple (Betty White and Richard Dysart) severely needed to be axed.

But all that said, the movie does work, on its own terms. This is nothing that’s going to win an Academy Award, but for thrills and excitement, it will deliver bang for your (matinee) dollar. A flood might not be in the same class as volcanoes, twisters and earthquakes, but after seeing this film you sure don’t want to be in one.

The best advice is to watch this film without questioning too many of the details. (Such as…with all the shotgun blasts going on, why doesn’t anyone’s boat get holed?) But if you sit back and simply enjoy the mindless peril, you’ll have a good time.

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Half Baked - 1/2*

Nostalgia for the 70s continues, as we see a revival of one of the decade’s greatest achievements: the marijuana comedy. However Half Baked doesn’t quite run with all its brain cells, and will make you appreciate the questionable talents of Cheech and Chong all the more.

The plot follows the misadventures of four ne’er-do-well stoners. There’s the group’s unofficial leader, Thurgood (David Chappelle), Scarface (Guillermo Diaz), Brian (Jim Breuer), and Kenny (Harland Williams).

Kenny gets into trouble, when, while on a munchie run, feeds his snack foods to a diabetic police horse. When the animal keels over, he finds himself accused of killing a police officer, and facing a $1,000,000 bail.

His friends promise to raise money for a 10% bail bond, but have no idea how. That is, until Thurgood stumbles upon a stash of pharmaceutical marijuana being tested at the company where he works as a janitor. Soon the three guys are dealing dope to raise funds, while avoiding the cops and rival dealer Sampson Simpson (Clarence Williams III).

For a comedy, the film is pretty humorless. Not that it doesn’t try…it’s just that the comic setups are obvious and the payoffs nearly all fall flat. The four leads are nearly all playing the same character. Only Williams stands out (while still performing on the level of his humor-free comedy Rocket Man), but that is because he’s imprisoned throughout most of the film, giving a much needed change of pace (but mostly swapping one set of obvious gags for another).

To help out, the film is packed full of cameos. Steven Wright, Tommy Chong, Janeane Garofalo, Willie Nelson, Snoop Doggy Dogg, and Jon Stewart all make appearances at one point or another. None of them work, beyond the simple “hey, that’s _____” level.

In fact the funniest work in the film comes from Chappelle. Not as his bland pothead lead, but in his second role, as a pot-obsessed rapper. Granted, it’s pretty much a one-joke role, and there aren’t a ton of laughs…but this film needs every one it can scrape up.

To top it off, and in a move contrasting with the tone of the rest of the film, Thurgood is given a love interest, Mary Jane (Rachel True). Her role is that of the Public Service Announcement: to inform us why doing drugs (including pot) is wrong. Her character seems fabricated merely as a defense to the “your film promotes the use of drugs” camp. The film would have been better off by sticking with the “rebel” tone it so eagerly tries to claim.

Yet, in the end, it doesn’t really matter. Watching the film clean and sober, you are bound to recognize how truly awful it is.

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Fallen - * *

Fallen

How’s this for a plot: cop stalks supernatural body-swapping entity. No, it’s not a remake of The First Power, but it is Fallen, an mostly unsuccessful thriller whose good cast can’t overcome a bad script.

Detective John Hobbes (Denzel Washington) has finally reached closure with one of his toughest cases. Killer Edgar Reese (Elias Koteas) is finally being executed. However, Reese doesn’t seem too distraught at the occurence, singing The Rolling Stones’ Time is On My Side as he is gassed.

Soon more killings occur throughout the city, each with the same set of circumstances used by Reese. More disturbingly, each victim seems to be killed by a different murderer. It’s up to Detective Hobbes to stop the slayings, but he doesn’t suspect what has been unleashed.

A theology professor, Greta Milano (Embeth Davitz), is the first to reveal to Hobbes that his foe is of supernatural origin. The fallen angel Azazel, who can possess bodies with a simple touch, is to blame. For some (never explained) reason, Hobbes is unpossessable, and so Azazel has selected him as a target. But how can one stop a supernatural being?

Washington is as good as always in the role of the tormented cop, but there are too many scenes of him simply doing something, with the narration taking over, explaining what he’s doing. A more confident filmmaker would have shot the film without the narration (although it does provide a non-crucial twist), relying on the talents of Washington (or a better script) to convey the meaning of his actions.

Washington is surrounded by a good supporting cast, including his trusty partner, Jonesy (John Goodman), his secretive Lieutenant, Stanton (Donald Sutherland), the weaselly Lou (James Gandolfini), and the aforementioned Gretta (Embeth Davitz). You know as the film goes on that one (or more) of them will become hosts for Azazel. However, they seem to spend most of the film waiting for that moment to arrive, rather than doing any particularly interesting things.

There are a few interesting concepts, and a couple of thrilling scenes wherein the killer’s rapid body switching creates some true paranoia. However, one of the problems with creating a nearly all-powerful supernatural foe is defining its limits, something that Fallen fails to properly do. When we finally learn of Azazel’s true plans for revenge, we wonder why it didn’t just do that before. The only thing which would have stopped it was the script.

Fallen’s quasi-religious themes don’t ever quite play out. There are too many questions that go unanswered. (Such as why Denzel can’t be possessed? Or why this fallen angel acts more like a serial killer than a supernatural force?) When the screenplay gets stuck, it smugly hides behind a “there are some things we aren’t meant to know”. One or two of those might have been acceptable…but when the film is filled with them, you’re left to wonder, what’s the point?

Posted in 1998, Movie Reviews | Tagged , , , | Comments Off on Fallen