Cemetery Man is a very, very strange film that can't ever find a consistent mood,
and ends up being a spotty and repetitive black comedy. Rupert Everett is Francesco Delamorte, a graveyard
watchman, who, along with his trusty henchman Gnaghi (Francois Hadji-Lazaro) is forced
to do some rather unpleasant overtime work. It seems that a curious plague affects
the dead in Buffalora cemetery...seven days after death, the dead come back, and may only
be put to final rest by a bullet (or any sharp instrument) to the brain. He takes these
extra duties rather nonchalantly, until the 'returners' (as he calls them) are people he knows.
Add to this a series of identical but unrelated beautiful women, a horrific tragedy involving
nuns and boy scouts, an unsolved string of murders, ghostly dancing lights, a talking
head, political conspiracies, metaphysical dilemmas, Death personified, and some sex for good measure, and
you've got the ingredients for a good black horror/comedy, right? Well...yes...the film has
a whole lot of the necessary ingredients, but it doesn't seem to know what to do with them.
While some of the bizaare turns of events are amusing, others simply leave you scratching your
head. The film never takes one theme and builds upon it (in fact, the zombies, numerous in
the first hour of the film are surprisingly scarce in the final half-hour). When director Michele
Soavi does latch onto an idea, it is beaten to death. The end result might still become a
cult film, simply due to the strange plot, but it is nowhere near the inspired insanity it strives for.
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